


How to Say "I Love You" In Less than Three Words

by goldenrose95



Category: VIXX
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, a dash of angst because hey that's who I am, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-15
Updated: 2016-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-22 12:36:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8286110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldenrose95/pseuds/goldenrose95
Summary: Leo always had difficulty putting things into words, and declarations of love were no exceptions.So he finds his own ways to say "I love you."





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first VIXX fic I hope it isn't as terrible as I think it is.  
> I wrote this as a birthday present for my starlight friend and she liked it so I thought, "Hey, why not post it and see what others think?"  
> So here I go.

Leo was never a man of much words.

He liked to think of himself as a man of action instead, always showing his thoughts and emotions through what he did for others. He was never the best at expressing himself, and neither was he an expert in love, but when he did fall in love he declared it in action.

Because "I love you" didn't have to be three words. It could be, "Do you want a mocha?" or "Go rest" or "Let me." It could be hugs, kisses, and dates, the quiet moments of peace when two people were together, aware of no other presence save each other. It was in every second they shared together, in every memory they made, from the very beginning to this moment right now.

***

The first time they met, it was just a thought that he never managed to form into words. They had just gotten into the entertainment, he was still Taekwoon, and the trainees were meeting for the first time. But after the introductions were over he retreated to the back of the room without talking to anyone. N - just Hakyeon back then - had tried to strike up some conversation, but Taekwoon’s silence eventually shut the future leader up. It wasn't that he hated company, more that he wasn't used to them yet, and that he didn't care much for words. He still looked out for each of them, always watching to see if any of them needed anything, if he could help in any way.

The opportunity came at the end of a dance practice, when he found a boy almost out of breath, leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. Taekwoon picked up an unopened bottle of water and headed over to where the boy was, set it down next to his hand, and left without a word. But just before he was out of earshot, a quiet "Thanks" whispered through parched lips reached his ears, and Taekwoon walked away with the faintest of smiles on his lips, the quiet _You're welcome_  thought in his head without a sound. The boy probably didn't even remember his name, but Taekwoon remembered his: it was Kim Wonshik.

***

The first time he saw Wonshik cry, it was a short condolence uttered in a rush. It was when Wonshik's sister Jiwon surprised him with a visit to their dorm, and he broke down in tears when he saw her. The other members tried to give him space, with the exception of Hongbin taking pictures - to make fun of him in the future, Taekwoon could guess. But what the other members didn't know was that Wonshik cried after she left.

It was in the middle of the night when Taekwoon got up to use the toilet, and his hand was already on the doorknob when his sleep-infested brain finally caught on the sound of muffled sobs coming from the living room. From what happened earlier that night, he didn't have to look outside to guess who it was. Taekwoon quickly grabbed a box of tissue and opened the door.

In the darkness of the living room he could see the faint outline of Wonshik on the floor, huddled in a corner with his head bowed and his arms around his knees. Wonshik raised his head when he heard the door open, but before he could say anything, Taekwoon crossed the living room to where he was and placed the box of tissue in his lap.

"Don't cry," he said quietly with a hand on Wonshik's shoulder, then returned to his room. Neither of them ever mentioned it again, both probably trying to save the other from embarrassment.

***

After their debut, it was in the times they shared together as members of VIXX, together on stage and in the practice rooms. They were Leo and Ravi now, and they had a team that they loved more than anything. It was in the small, rare smiles and jokes, the warm hugs and spoonfuls of food that always went to Ravi first, the subtle locking of their gazes and the brushing of fingertips that may or may not have been intentional. But it always struck Leo with a strange pang in his heart that he had felt only once or twice before, and now one thing was for sure - he was falling in love with one of his members.

***

On their first date, it was a few words that he had rehearsed in his head over and over again. Ravi had mentioned a movie in passing, apparently one he wanted to watch for a while now, but could never find the time for. Leo later found himself looking the movie up and downloading it, his mind already busy making plans before he could stop himself. He wondered for days about what he should do. There had been many imaginary dates he had planned before this, but he always talked himself out of it, telling himself it wouldn't be worth all the potential trouble it could cause. But he was done waiting now. He had fallen in love a long time ago, and it obviously wasn't going to stop anytime soon. If he was going to be rejected, perhaps it would help him give up.

Leo meticulously planned everything out, from what he was going to say to how the date should progress. He then somehow managed to discreetly approach Ravi when he was alone, which was much harder than it sounded, considering the number of members in their group. Leo noticed Ravi's face immediately brightening up when he mentioned the movie in his laptop.

"Do you want to watch it tonight?" Leo asked, and a delighted smile appeared on Ravi’s face.

"Sure! I'll ask the others too if..."

"No," Leo quickly said, and Ravi’s smile changed into a confused look. Leo could feel his mind going blank, and he forced himself to utter the words that he had practiced in his head over and over again.

"Just us."

Ravi stared at him for a second, then dropped his gaze, his lips quietly mouthing, “Oh.”

"You don't have to, if you don't want to," Leo hastily added. "We can invite the others too... if it makes you uncomfortable."

Leo watched Ravi, wondering if he'd reject the proposal. But a shy smile slowly spread over Ravi's face, and Leo felt himself relaxing just at the sight. He liked seeing this boy happy.

"Alright," Ravi finally said. "Tonight, after everyone's gone to sleep?"

Leo nodded, a strange giddiness blooming somewhere inside him and filling his heart.

That night they slipped out into the living room when the rest of the members were asleep and sat down on the floor with Leo's laptop on their laps. As the movie progressed the laptop got considerably hotter, but Leo didn't mind as long as he could feel Ravi next to him, biting the pillow he brought to avoid reacting too loudly to everything that happened inside the screen and waking the members up. Leo tried to keep a respectable distance, but by the end of the movie they were leaning into each other, shoulder to shoulder with Ravi's head hanging to the side, right next to Leo's. Ravi hugged his pillow with a contented sigh, then straightened up and turned to the older man.

"That was great. Let's do it again sometime."

Leo wordlessly nodded, hoping Ravi meant what he thought he meant.

***

The first time Ravi told him in words, it was a quiet reply that sent fireworks alight in his veins. It was during another one of their sneaky midnight dates, this time just a lighthearted conversation. They talked hours into the night until Ravi was essentially falling asleep where he sat. Leo knew that the lack of sleep was making it even harder for Ravi to wake up in the morning and that he was falling asleep in random places more and more often, but nowadays it was Ravi who proposed the dates first, and no way on earth could Leo refuse that.

But today Ravi actually dozed off in one of those peaceful pockets of silence that sometimes appeared during their dates, his head nodding in sleep and rolling off to the side. It was a good thing Leo had been sitting next to him and caught his head on his shoulder.

"Wonshik," he softly whispered, bringing up a hand and brushing his knuckles against the bronze skin of his lover's face. "You have to go to bed."

Ravi let out a sleepy groan and groggily opened his eyes, then smiled as he leaned into the touch, wrapping his arms around Leo.

"I love you," he murmured.

Leo hadn't expected it, and he swore he felt his heart dive when he heard those words spoken directly from the lips of the man he so adored. Sure, the members said "I love you" tons of times to each other, and they meant it - Leo treated all of them like the brothers he never had, and he was sure the other members regarded each other as family as well.

But this was different. Words and emotions mixed in Leo’s mind, and he wanted to tell Ravi exactly how he felt, but he wouldn't have been able to describe all the love and exuberancy exploding inside himself even if he had been given the entire vocabulary of every known language.

So he just whispered, "Me too," and helped Ravi up, guiding him all the way to his room and regretting the fact that he couldn't see his lover to bed.

***

At the time of their first kiss, it was a silent lean and a moment of impulse that he had wished for for a long time, on one night when they were busy working on their songs. Since they were the only producers in their team, songwriting allowed them considerable time together. The only thing preventing them from spending all day goofing around with each other and actually getting work done was the fact that they were placed in separate rooms when working on their songs.

It was getting late, though, and Leo had decided to call it a day and came over to Ravi's producing room so they could go home together. But whatever muse that had been inspiring his boyfriend must have gotten jealous of their love, because Ravi was still absorbed in his work, and hadn't said more than a few words since Leo entered the room ten minutes ago. Leo withheld a sigh and quietly laid his head on Ravi’s shoulder, who knew him well enough to understand that he meant, “Let’s go home.”

“Alright, alright,” Ravi said, absently patting Leo’s head as he stared hard at the screen, giving some last-minute touches to the song he was working on. Leo lifted his head to look at Ravi, who was completely engrossed in his work with a hand on his lips and a slight frown on his brows.

And for some reason, Leo thought he never looked more beautiful.

He reached forward and pushed Ravi’s hand away from his lips, and the younger man turned around with a surprised look. The two sat like that for a moment, gaze locked, and Leo wished he could express into words everything he felt right now.

 

_You’re beautiful._

_I’m so glad I met you._

_Don’t ever leave me._

_I love you._

 

But the eloquence that had been dodging him all his life wasn’t about to make a sudden magical appearance to save the moment, so Leo just leaned in and closed the space between their lips.

It was short and quick and chaste, nothing more than a peck on the lips, but when Leo drew away, Ravi stared at him, looking completely flustered with a light blush hinting through his tan cheeks. He then reached forward and pulled Leo into another kiss, and this time, it lasted a little longer.

***

On their first fight, it was an apology for silence and a promise to carry on. It all started because Leo reached for Ravi’s hand during an interview, and he drew away. Leo knew it made logical sense. They talked about this - they had to keep their relationship a secret. It could ruin everything, it could potentially break up VIXX, and neither of them wanted that. So they were careful not to make things too obvious between them, at least in public. Ravi sometimes hugged him and played around with him in front of the camera, but Leo was noticing more and more hesitation in his eyes and actions - and it hurt. Their secret relationship had been going on for over a year now, and it was certainly taking a toll on them both.

Leo ended up retreating into himself as he had done in the beginning of VIXX, ignoring Ravi almost completely and pretending nothing was wrong. He wished he could say something about how he felt, like his heart was about to burst out from his chest, but his mind was in shambles and his emotions were all mixed up and confusing him, and nothing made it out of his lips. He was used to the members speaking for him now that they knew him well enough, but this wasn't something he could ask anyone to say in his stead. Then again, the tension between him and Ravi hadn't gone completely unnoticed - the members were acting a little wary whenever the two were in the same room, which, due to the fact that they were actually in the same group, happened far too often for Leo's liking.

Leo ended up keeping his silence until the next day, at the end of which N sat him and Ravi down in the waiting room after a performance and told them neither of them were leaving until they talked this out. He then actually left the room with the other members, leaving Leo and Ravi staring awkwardly at the floor.

Leo tried to ignore Ravi again, never mind what N said. But his mind was racing far ahead of him, and everything he had bottled up inside was exploding all at once. He loved Ravi - there was no question about that. He just wished it didn't have to hurt so much. He didn't want to force their relationship to secrecy, as if it was something they had to be ashamed of. He didn't want to live a double life. He didn't want to build a wall between them and the other members when it had taken him so long to get this close to them. He didn't want to have to choose between Ravi and the rest of VIXX.

"Can't we just tell them?" Leo blurted out, and Ravi lifted his head with an incredulous look on his face. That was part of Leo's problem - most of the thinking happened inside his head and only little tidbits of the thoughts actually came through and became verbal communication.

"You haven't talked to me since yesterday and that's the first thing you say?" Ravi said, and Leo realized that his boyfriend already had tears in his eyes that he was desperately trying to choke back. Leo got up and locked the door - thankfully there were no windows - before returning to his seat and dragging his chair close to Ravi’s so that their knees were practically touching. But his thoughts were still all over the place, and he had to work his mind, forcing the words out one by one.

"I just... didn't want you to avoid me. It's not like... what we have right now... is a bad thing. I don't want to keep having secrets... from everyone. It's hard for me."

"And that's why you didn't talk to me for an entire day?" Ravi said, his voice low and pained. "You're the one who's been avoiding me."

"I... I didn't know what to think. I needed time. And I was angry too."

"Well maybe next time, give me some heads-up before you start completely ignoring me."

"Then don't push me away like that."

Ravi froze, then put his face in his hands.

"You know I have to," he muttered through his palms, his head still bowed. "The fans are already noticing. You should see the things they put up on the internet." Ravi raised his head. The tears were gone, but the distress was still there.

"Then what about our members?" Leo persisted. This wasn't like him - normally he would have apologized and shut up, then return to pretending like everything was alright. But right now his brain was filled up with something, a more bitter version of what he felt whenever he was with Ravi, and he couldn't stop arguing.

Ravi went silent for a while, then sighed.

"Can it be later?" he finally said. "I don't think I'm ready. Not right now. Just... I think I need to prepare myself for it."

Leo nodded. He never wanted to hurt Ravi. All he wanted was to love him without anything getting in their way, but somehow it was much more difficult than it should have been. He wanted to tell him that, but the words were stuck in his throat, and he just leaned forward with his arms open wide. Ravi fell right into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Leo as well.

"I'm sorry," Leo whispered.

"I'm sorry too," Ravi replied, and Leo tightened his arms around him. It still hurt, the fact that their relationship had to be secret, but he was willing to go through with it all if that was what Ravi wanted.

Because he just realized that through all the pain, not once did he think about breaking up. He could keep the secret and live through everything if Ravi was there with him, no matter how much time was needed.

***

At the time they told their members, it was a quick burst of words, honest, plain, and fully proud to declare Ravi his lover. They talked about telling the members for a while, but things were finally beginning to stabilize, and the fear of messing everything up again made them put it off to some distant future, maybe this week, this month, this year.

Until one day Ken got up in the middle of the night and caught them kissing in the veranda.

All three men stood frozen in silence until Ken walked away without a word, leaving the two lovers in utter chaos.

Leo and Ravi stayed up for hours discussing their next course of action - Should they ask Ken to keep quiet? Should they pretend nothing happened? - and finally concluded that it was about time they told the members. Secrets didn't stay long in the group, and theirs had been going on for long enough. Leo wrapped his arms around Ravi, who had been freaking out from the moment Ken disappeared into his room.

"Do you want me to say it?" he softly whispered, cradling his lover to his chest. He himself knew how bad he was with words, but if Ravi needed him to, he'd do it. Ravi quietly sighed.

"Together," he said. "We're doing this together."

Thankfully the next day was free, so right after breakfast, the two gathered the members in the living room, saying they had something to tell. Ken obviously knew what was up, but Leo wondered if the others had caught on yet. The members gathered one by one in the living room, Leo sitting next to Ravi, though he didn't touch him. They had to tell the members first before they could officially display affection.

Even after the members gave them their full attention, Ravi took a long time trying to form coherent sentences. His hands wouldn't stay still, and Leo noticed that Ravi almost reached for his hands once or twice, then caught himself before he went too far. When a full minute of awkward silence passed and Ravi withdrew his hand from Leo for the third time, Leo just reached out and took his hand.

"We're dating," he said flatly, no introductions, no subtle hints, as was his usual manner of speech. Two decades' worth of habit wasn't going anywhere. Leo forced himself to hold his head high and look at each member in the eye. This was not something he was ashamed of, and he would make sure everyone knew that.

Ravi's head spun around to stare at him, but before he could say anything, N sprang up from his seat with a loud "Yes!" The others stared at him, utterly confused, until Hyuk sighed, took out a 10,000 won bill, and handed it to N.

"Hyuk and I made a bet when you said you had something to tell us," N said, regarding the green note smugly. "I bet that you guys were going to come out, and he thought it would be something else."

"I thought you'd keep it secret for at least another year," Hyuk said, shaking his head. Ravi’s mouth fell open, and his eyes looked like they were ready pop out of their sockets.

"Wait, you knew?" he almost shouted, and N rolled his eyes with a laugh.

"It's about time you realize it's really difficult to keep a secret within a group," he said. "So, spill it guys. When exactly did it start? And who asked who out?"

Ravi took on from then, telling their story from the beginning, while Leo sat by him and listened, their hands still tightly clasped together. The members promised to keep the secret and to make sure they covered them up as best as they could in public. N even offered to switch rooms with Ravi so he could share with Leo.

"Just don't be too loud," N said with a little wink, and Leo launched himself onto the leader when he understood the joke. Ravi had to hold him back.

***

Leo was never a man of much words, but there were a few, rare occasions when he did declare his love verbally. Some of them came from Ravi whining that Leo never actually told him that he loved him, while others were the members making fun of them, trying to get Leo to openly say "I love you" to Ravi. And there were other times when Leo genuinely felt those words in his heart and formed them on his lips, which were extremely rare. But Ravi was always delighted to hear them, and Leo loved seeing the expression on his face when he said those words, so he did try to give the thoughts a verbal form more and more often. Still, it was always a little embarrassing, and words were ever a rare occurrence for him.

But today would be one of those days. Today he would tell the world that he was in love with this man, make sure everybody knew that they belonged to each other.

Today, it would be a vow.

There were only a few people present - mostly their immediate families and close friends, obviously including the members of VIXX. Leo could think of no better people to be present at the ceremony where they celebrated the love that all six of them had tried so hard to protect for years. From what Leo could see out of the corner of his eyes, N was already sobbing in his seat, and Hyuk and Ken were trying to calm him down. Hongbin was busy taking pictures - he promised them the best photo album ever.

But all of Leo's attention was soon diverted to the man standing in front of him, looking more beautiful than ever in a magnificent suit with his black hair perfectly combed down. He almost did take Leo's breath away when he saw him all dressed up for the first time. But right now a drop of tear hung over the edge of his eyes, and he was biting his lips with his head slightly bowed, trying hard not to cry. Leo reached for his face and gently wiped the tear from his eyes before it could fall, and Ravi raised his head, his look of surprise dissolving into a smile when their gazes met. After years of dating Leo was still terrible at expressing himself, and he didn't know how he was supposed to tell Ravi how much he loved him, how insanely and unbelievably happy he was right now, how he promised they'd be together till the end of their days.

But of course, his words always failed him when he needed them most. So he just whispered two words before sliding a ring onto Ravi’s finger and pulling him into a kiss that sealed his oath to love him as long as he lived, until death did them part.

"I do."


End file.
